Where to Look: Knowing Which Way Is Right or Not.

Have you ever been at a point in your life where you didn't know where to go, who to be around, or which way was right? Why are my feelings always so up and down? How come people don't understand me, and better yet, why don't I understand myself?

Every single one of us has the innate quality of being something great. To reach unimaginable mountains. To obtain greatness by finding our purpose. I know — easier said than done. Trust me, I know. I've been there, and I'm somewhere there now, or at least I think I am.

The truth is, I am humbled. I get constant reminders that humility is one of the biggest drivers I must be aware of at all times, because I don't have control over anything outside of my own decisions. There are no guaranteed outcomes in my favor. Sad but true.

So where do we look for answers? Who do we go to? Who is the most knowledgeable person who can support us for a greater chance of reaching our desired outcome?

First, look around. See who is there with you. Do you know anyone?

And that up and down feeling that comes and goes? That's an indicator of imbalance. It means there is something unstable within you that needs regulating. No, it doesn't mean you need a doctor or a therapist, but it does need to be checked by no one other than you.

Introducing the L.P.T.R. Method

I have created a new method that I believe is helpful, should you feel the need to approach situations with a clearer objective. I call it the L.P.T.R. Method: Listen, Pause, Think, Respond.

This is how we digest information more effectively instead of diving in without direction. By using this method, you find help within yourself. It will:

1. Suggest to you where to look and give you a better chance to hear what sounds right for you

2. Offer the mental tools to stop and think long enough to gauge whether or not a situation even requires a response

   
   

Let's face it, too many of us react to just about anything that throws us off balance. I know I do.

The Mirror

The mirror can be a terrifying reflection if you are not balanced properly. I remember several years ago having the worst conversations with myself. I'm sure you've been there too, the kind where there are voices in your head making up a bunch of bull**. I would tell myself things that were just… not… true.

It started with I can't.

I can't get the job I want. I can't become the size I want. I can't get the position I wanted. I can't become better than I am right now. I can't… I can't… I can't.

During that time, I was also experiencing losses of close friends and family members, and those losses did something to me. I lost my vision and my direction. The only truth that was accurate at the time was that I couldn't save the lives of the people I loved or control the fate of anyone else. That was hard.

That's when the mirror made sense. That's when I learned about L.P.T.R. — I just hadn't named it yet. I simply didn't like the reflection staring back at me.

When you look in the mirror and don't like what you see, the mirror is broken, cracked, shattered, or distorted. The truth is, the real reflection is an amazing thing — but it lives underneath the surface. Too many of us compromise our values for the wrong reasons. Choosing the wrong person to date, marry, or spend time with. Holding onto habits we know no longer serve us. Why do we do it?

The broken mirror is why.

We can't see our true reflection because we are convinced that who we are is shown externally. That is not true. The true person can only be shown from the inside out.

Read that again, this time, practice L.P.T.R. while you do.

That's a hard concept to grasp. But you got it.

Think about the people who have made a real impact in the world. What they produce doesn't come from good looks or anything external. It comes from what they do, what they create, and who they choose to be. Think about it.

Where to Look

If you are looking at the outer layers of your being for answers, imbalance is the only thing you will receive by default.

That is why I built the L.P.T.R. Method — and why it lives inside a larger system called the R.O.O.F. Framework, under the IamRoof umbrella. I built this because I believe it is important that we see ourselves clearly and that we pay attention to the people around us as well. The more grounded we are, the better.

Our children are counting on us. They are watching our every move. To some of them, we are their mirror, and they should not have to see us broken.

Listen. Pause. Think. Respond.